Test Drive: An Exaiphnes Vignette
Written by Rachel

"She was a good friend," Mulder said, pulling Tim close to him. "You two were together a long time."

Tim nodded, a tear dropping from the corner of his eye. "I can't believe I'm reacting this way, but ... she was my first, you know. Got me through some rough times. Always there when I needed her. I just feel like, I don't know...like I'm failing her now."

Mulder reached up to dry Tim's tear. "It'll be okay. Hey, we got 35 bucks for her...that'll get us at least another...I don't know...headlight?"

Tim leaned down to pat the old Jeep. "Okay, but let's get out of here. I don't want to watch while they compact her."

They turned and walked back out the gate of the salvage yard.


"How about this one?" Mulder asked, kicking the tires on yet another in a series of sport utility vehicles.

"Why do we keep looking at SUVs?" Tim whined.

"Because you're 6'4" and I'm not going to rub your back every time we drive up to Philadelphia to see your Aunt Mary. I don't understand what you see in the Ford Focus wagon anyway," Mulder responded.

"We have gone to see my aunt exactly once and the Focus gets 35 miles to the gallon on the highway. Do you know what your Explorer gets?" Tim asked.

Mulder shook his head.

"Twenty. Fourteen in town. Fourteen! We'll spend a fortune. Why are we only looking at Fords anyway?"

"It's a tradition. My family has always driven Fords," Mulder responded, leaning over to look more carefully at the bumper on the back of the maroon truck.

"This must be how you ended up with the neon blue Probe," Tim teased.

Mulder turned and shot him a withering glance. "Let's just test drive this and get it over with. Can you do that?"

Tim nodded and held his hands open for the keys.


"Nice ride, don't you think?" Mulder asked, reaching his arm along the back of the seat.

"Yeah, but it's kind of a truck, don't you think?" Tim asked, glancing over his shoulder to change into the right lane.

"We could use it to haul things," Mulder replied.

"You planning to start a salvage business?" Tim asked.

"No, I just meant if I needed to move some files or something or we got a new TV. It could be convenient," Mulder answered.

"If you need to move files you will put in a requisition to the FBI. I have a bad back. You don't need to wreck yours. I highly doubt we will buy a new TV, but if we do, it would fit in the back of the wagon."

"I'm not buying a station wagon," Mulder stated shortly. "Pull over. I want to drive."

Tim signaled and moved the Explorer up the next exit ramp. He put it into park and jumped out. Mulder exited the passenger side and walked past him wordlessly. Tim sighed and got into the right side door.

Mulder adjusted the steering wheel and took off, squealing the tires slightly as he pulled back into traffic.

"We aren't going back?" Tim asked, looking over at Mulder.

Mulder shook his head, running his tongue over his lips lightly. "No. I just...I just wanted to show you that there could be benefits to owning a larger car."

He signaled again and exited onto a county road. They rode in silence for a few minutes as the road twisted and turned, the area growing less and less inhabited.

"They'll wonder where we went," Tim said, finally.

"They want to sell their car," Mulder responded, quickly signaling and turning onto an even narrower road. He drove down the potholed surface until it dead-ended. Turning to his companion, he leaned over and put his arms around Tim, pulling him close, Mulder's tongue doing some deep sea exploring.

He eased Tim back toward the window, Tim's body sliding easily across the leather seats. He ran his hands down Tim's chest, loosening his belt and unzipping Tim's pants. With relative ease Mulder slid across the driver's seat, dropping down on his knees in front of Tim. He continued to explore Tim's body, sliding his hand into Tim's pants. Tim sighed and pressed back further into the seat.

"Hey, what's that?" Mulder said, pulling his hand back out.

"What?" Tim asked, sitting up again.


"Oh, I liked how it felt after the surgery, so I shaved them again. You like it?" Tim asked, a smile on his face. He eased back into his previous position.

Mulder laughed. "Bayliss, you're weird. But, I have to admit it's kind of nice, kind of like running your hand over a baby's butt."

"That's sick," Tim replied, leaning into kiss Mulder lightly on the mouth.

Mulder smiled and slid Tim's pants down. His newly shaved scrotum was a light pink. Mulder slid his tongue over the surface, liking the novel sensation, and then continued on up to the tip of Tim's growing penis, swirling his tongue around it like he would an ice cream cone.

"Jesus, don't tease," Tim panted. He had shaved on a whim that morning; the hair growing in had been so irritating. It felt a little naughty to have Mulder down there now, but it also felt good. Very good.

Mulder chuckled in the back of his throat as he pulled Tim further into his mouth, his hand reaching up to stroke Tim's soft skin. Tim's back arched up slightly. Suddenly his seat started to recline backward, a quiet motor humming. Mulder continued to minister to Tim's needs as the detective was now nearly prone on the seat. Mulder was relentless in his attack, taking Tim deep, moaning along with his lover as the long, hard erection pumped back deep in his throat. Tim was close. Then his hips bucked up slightly as he came in Mulder's mouth, pulsing faster than Mulder could swallow, and spilling along the edge of the Explorer's seat.

"Shit!" Tim exclaimed, as the intensity of the orgasm continued to wash over him. "I haven't done that since...well, Karen Wagner, 10th grade, right after I bought my Volkswagen Rabbit."

"So, what do you think?" Mulder asked. "Notice how easy the leather cleans up," he said slyly, with a wink in his lover's direction. He pulled his handkerchief out and wiped up Tim's cum from the edge of the seat.

"Well, it definitely won't work to have a station wagon," Tim answered, still slightly breathless. "But you have to take the train everyday. No unnecessary trips to DC for any reason. Gas prices are going to continue to climb into the summer and we're not giving up our vacation fund so you can drive this albatross."

"Agreed," Mulder answered with a satisfied smile as he crawled back into the driver's seat and started the car.

The End